Central Air
Right up front, Im gonna tell you that Im a little
uncomfortable admitting this, but we got central air conditioning back at the house. Now
Im third generation Narberth, and front porches, fans, and lemonade were good enough
for my Daddy and Granddaddy, so thats good enough for me. Heck, thats why they
invented Ocean City.
But we did a little remodeling on the homestead
six or seven years ago, and the missus put her foot down, and so while the guy was fixin
up the kitchen we got some central air conditioning while he was at it. Still making
payments, too.
The reason I gave in and agreed to it was because you gotta understand what happens to the missus when the hot weather rolls in. I mean you cant hear yourself think over the sighing and moaning. Her whole personality changes. Youd think I was some hired hand or something. I got cramps in my feet from tiptoeing. I remember summers where wed go a week without food unless I went out and brought back something already cooked. One bath she took lasted three and half days.
Anyway, shes plenty happy now. Of course during this heat wave weve started seeing little clusters of neighbors gathering in the street outside our place, staring at our closed windows, muttering to each other. Its them I feel bad about. I mean they cant help that they was raised to believe air conditioning was some kind of wasteful luxury for Lower Merion types.
Of course, right this minute I aint feeling too guilty, the missus is cooking tonight.
July 6, 1999